McDonald's Neglects Bacon on Bacon, Egg, Cheese Biscuit

Once in a while I get a taste for a bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit from our local McDonald's. Yesterday morning would be the second time, in a row, that I would go without bacon on my bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit. In a row, is important to consider since I rarely go through the drive thru and order my favorite kind of biscuit. So that when this happened again yesterday, I decided I could not stay silent and aid McDonald's in their past two attempts to not put bacon on my bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit.

McDonald's image of their Bacon, Egg, and Cheese Biscuit confirms my suspicion that bacon, indeed, is supposed to come on the Bacon, Egg, and Cheese Biscuit. It also confirms that my biscuits should not look like the next image.

I know what all of you must be thinking. If it happened the last time, why would I not check before I drove away this last time. Correct? Well. Because they had previously made good and offered me a free bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit with a coffee on the house, and because I checked it that time, who would have possibly thought that in a million years it would happen back to back? Not me. So this time I did the same thing I did the last time. Upon noticing the lack of bacon, I called the local McDonald's that handily has their telephone number on the receipt.

To make matters even worse, as I was listening to the soft ring of the local McDonald's telephone, that they would not answer this time, I noticed something else on the receipt I had never noticed before: A Take Out Tax. A take out tax? So that when I drive to McDonald's to order my biscuit through the drive-thru on gasoline that costs $3.89 a gallon, only to drive home on gasoline that costs me $3.89 a gallon, to discover they charged me for my bacon but did not include it, they charge me a take out tax in addition to not answering their phone after 7 attempts in the course of two hours.

Take Out Tax & Dine In Tax

Upon being reminded this evening of how I was short-baconed in addition to an itemized line called "Take Out Tax," I did a search and found another person who apparently had a "Eat In Tax." His "eat in tax" was noticed much as my "take out tax" was; just glancing at the receipt.

Before we get our britches in a bunch, though, Justin explained this tax and I noticed a decrease in my blood pressure right away:

McDonald's has an obligation to explain CLEARLY every line item on your check, and this is where they failed miserably. The words EAT IN are simply stating the mode that the order was placed. So, if you ordered your same exact meal to go, you would get a receipt that says TAKE OUT TAX, and the charge would be the same.

Where's the Bacon?

I have one strong theory as to what is happening to my bacon. You probably think it's just an unfortunate coincidence that two times in a row I would visit McDonald's and receive a baconless bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit right? Wrong. As far as me and food go, if there is going to be a karmic convergence regarding food, it will be with me!

My Bacon Crumble Theory

Now normally I wouldn't go accusing the fine hard-working, and fast food educated McDonald's employees of swiping my bacon, but here is the evidence that supports that theory: Upon consuming my _______, egg and cheese biscuit yesterday morning, I noticed a vague smoky, remnant of a taste of bacon but chalked it up to wishful thinking. I chalked it up to a psychosomatic indulgence until, at my very last bite, I noticed a crumble. Yes! A crumble!

A McDonald's employee is stealing the bacon from the already baconed biscuit!

Almost like one employee built my biscuit with the bacon but then another employee decided she wanted some bacon to eat and took it from the biscuit that would be mine, and quickly wrapped it and put it under the heat lamp so that no one would be the wiser. That one crumble; One solo piece of bacon remnant would be all that would be left to tell the tale of the dark thievery.

A Non-answered Phone or a Busy Phone!

This could also explain why, this time, I did not get an answer when I called. Perhaps due to her last shenanigans of bacon stealing off biscuits, a manager had a team meeting of missing bacon being reported off the Bacon, Egg, and Cheese. So this time she was more clever; She turned the McDonald's phone ringer off! Turning the phone ringer off would explain why phone calls today have resulted in nothing but the busy signal!

• Others beside me, this has happened to, are calling in droves letting the phone ring 25 times, like I did, but still getting no answer
• They have had so many complaints, and cannot possibly explain this mess, that someone has decided to put the phone off the hook.

As of now, 29 hours later, I have called at least 30 times with no response or a busy signal..

McDonald's,
Where is the bacon?

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From the wild and wacky imagination and true life experiences of Digits